It's been an odd month and a half. The week before Christmas, within a span of 48 hours, I learned that Stephie's job was a mess, and then Jerry's job at Caterpillar had been eliminated. It seemed fitting that I learned this during the darkest part of winter. I will admit that it was a hard week for me. I will also admit that the news hit me hard, and I've struggled to figure it out. However, like winter into spring, I'm beginning to see God's hand at work as I learn (once again--I'm a slow learner, apparently) to put my trust in Him and allow Him to guide us through this process. Slowly, things are emerging and beginning to show life. Stephie has found a new job, and Jerry has been put into a pool within Caterpillar to hopefully find a new position at Caterpillar. I'm calling 2013 the year of transitions.
You know how dirty and gray the yard looks in the middle of winter? Yet, already, I'm seeing a few daffodil leaves come up just enough to give me hope. Years ago, my grandmother would insist that the winter had been too cold and had killed everything (she would start this at the end of February, because by then in Mississippi, things had been blooming for weeks). We would assure her that no, things weren't dead--they were just taking awhile. Sure enough, within a few weeks, her yard would be in full bloom and, once again, beautiful. Patience is a virtue (and one that I could stand some work on). So it is that I'm beginning to see some things happen that shows me that God has this under control and I should back off with the worrying!
I'm one of those people that sticks in a CD while in the car, and on occasion, the lyrics on the CD will really speak to me, and I'll listen to it until it's about worn out. So it has been with a Larnelle Harris CD that I just randomly stuck in the CD player recently (and if you know me at all, you know I have a soft spot for my tenors). It's one of his lesser known CDs called I Want to be a Star (like a star in heaven, shining for Jesus, not like a star on stage). Anyway, several of the songs really were exactly what I needed to hear. This one, in particular, has spoken to me the past couple of weeks (I told you I listen to them a long time when they speak to me). I would like to share the lyrics with you:
If Not For the Storms
Words by Larnelle Harris
If all I had were blue skies
And days of perfect peace
Always sailing smoothly over
Gentle, Quiet seas
There's so much about You
I might have never known
But I have faced the wind and waves
And I see how faith has grown
If not for the storms
I couldn't say that You're my shelter
If not for the storms
I would have never known Your strength
I found You so faithful
Through all that You allowed
If not for the storms
There's no way I'd know You
As I know You now.
A shepherd strong and tender
I'd only read about
Met me in the middle of
My moments filled with doubt
A provider, a protector
A friend who knew my need
There's so much I can tell of who
You've proven Yourself to be.
If not for the storms
I couldn't say that You're my shelter
If not for the storms
I would have never known Your strength
I found You so faithful
Through all that You allowed
If not for the storms
There's no way I'd know You
As I know You now.
Sometimes it's hard to see the reasons for the trial I'm in
Looking from this earthly point of view
But You have surely proven to me time and time again
I can depend on you
To bring me through.
If not for the storms
I couldn't say that You're my shelter
If not for the storms
I would have never known Your strength
I found You so faithful
Through all that You allowed
If not for the storms
There's no way I'd know You
As I know You now.
So, yeah. That's kind of where I am right now. People are praying for our situations, and I feel the prayers. If you are so inclined, we would cherish your prayers that Jerry finds the right job for our family and that things will all come together for both him and Stephie in their new positions. Pray that God will see us through, as we continue to trust in Him, and not allow fear and doubt to overtake our thoughts, and that God will allow this time to bring us closer to Him as we see His work in our lives.
Thank you for remembering us, and God bless each of you.
